RIP Amy Winehouse

Imagine how many people die every year for the same reason Amy Winehouse did. This world we make is so cold, to let a person's misery kill her. And we made this world.

God have mercy and repose her soul and the souls of all those who die slaves to addiction.

May God have much more mercy on our souls, we who refuse to take responsibility for perpetuating and encouraging sin in the world.

May God have mercy on us, we who continuously repeat, over and over again, the first sinful thought, the most arrogant question asked, "Am I my brother's keeper?" (Genesis 4:9)

May God have mercy on us, according to His great mercy and not according to our deeds, we who allow sin to roam the streets freely and shamelessly, when we know that it is what leads to death.

Have mercy on us, O God, we who pay no heed to the struggles of our fellow man, we who choose to judge instead of edify.

Have mercy on me, O God, I who choose to ignore, instead of extending a sturdy hand to one drowning.

O God, have mercy on us all, we who think that to ignore the destruction that the sins of another leads him to, is what it means to accept him. Accept what, when they are dead? We, who think that to be tolerant is to ignore the sickness of a sick person. Tolerant of what? The ashes of Amy Winehouse?

O God, save us. For how long, O Lord? For how long will You allow us to hate truth and swallow lies, feeding them to others, and all the while choking on them ourselves? For how long will we deceive ourselves? For how long will we hate You?

O God, heal us of our pride, we who are too self-righteous, to inconvenience ourselves for the sake of the salvation of our fellow man.

O God, save us from ourselves, we who are the blind leading the blind. We, who call good evil and evil good.

O God, extend Your everlasting mercy toward us, we who deserve to have millstones tied around our necks and thrown into the sea, for leading others astray by our neglect.

Repose the souls of those who have died at our hands. For their blood is truly on our heads, and we have greatly sinned against You.

Are there other minds?

Perhaps it is true a property of reality is its indelible ability to seem unreal. (Philip Mendola) Maybe that's the only proof I have that other people are real. Because they are just so unrealistic.

Knowing Great People

You either let someone inspire or intimidate you.

What you let a given person do for you can change from time to time. Perhaps at first you found them inspiring, but then when you realized that you were too lazy to do anything with their inspiration, they started to serve as a judgement for your lack of creation, and you subsequently became intimidated and even annoyed with them.

Or perhaps at first you found them intimidating, their words too profound. They started to show you that you don't understand everything, and you were too proud to allow them to do that, so you shied away and avoided them. But then you got to relate to them a little more, you started liking them a little more; you realized your own ability, and that being in wonder is indeed more pleasant, and then used their inspiration to push you forward to create for yourself.

I think this is how friendships and relationships end, when you let the intimidation get the best of you. You stop feeling useful anymore, and you stop allowing yourself to do something with their inspiration so as to have something to offer the other person as well. The other starts to feel guilty too, like a burden to you, as if simply being themselves was destroying your relationship. And then they become detached.

But it is also how they flourish, if you let the inspiration get the best of you and use it as fuel to push forward and discover the Truth yourself. When you indulge in the eternal circle of fascination.

A Cure for Acne

If I were to make a useful toy, the toy would be a face. A face that has pimple-like protrusions that can be popped. Maybe it would be a mask that one can put on, popping all the pimples on the mask instead of one's actual face.

Then, when you've satisfied your compulsion, you leave the bathroom mirror, take off the mask, fold it up, and be on your way, with your face unscathed, and clear skin.

An Eye For An Eye

When people say, "An eye for an eye and the whole world would be blind," they are just trying to maintain the delusion that somehow modern society is morally superior to ancient societies, and the assumption made in that statement is just a sign of their hypocrisy. In fact, even so, I think the world has deteriorated to such an extent that it would do us good to return back to "An eye for an eye," because obviously "Do unto others and you would have them do unto you," hasn't done us any.

If the case really were an eye for an eye, then I think no one would be blind, because they would think about their actions before plucking out a person's eye, like "Jee, I wouldn't want to lose my eye, maybe I shouldn't pluck this person's eye out after all." But apparently people these days miss the point, and that seems to be the favorite thing of people to do these days.

For one to say, "An eye for an eye and the whole world would be blind," he must be making such an assumption based on what he sees in his own society today, and so his society must already be that way. It must already be evil, to only have the potential to lead to more evil. We must already be blind.

What I've concluded during this minuscule life of mine is that people don't want to get what's coming for them. That's why they make up self righteous mantras like, "If I actually gave a damn as to how what I did impacted others and held others in the same esteem that I hold of myself, well, that would just be preposterous! I would be blind to think that every way I hurt others, I am only hurting myself just as much! I must be self absorbed, for that is all a person has in this life, one only has his ego!" Oops, I meant to say, self righteous mantras like, "An eye for an eye and the whole world would be blind."

Yes, please go on and make the assumption that everyone is just as egocentric as you are. You've already plucked your own eyes out, saved another from doing the dirty job.

Oh yeah, it's been 36 centuries since that law, and people still have eyes. Just sayin'.

Soul, Body, Mind

Taking the leap of faith: the heavens, the ethereal and all things above.
Falling in love: the seas, the deep and all things therein.

Where is the earth? The terrestrial, and all those that walk upon the ground?--It is reason. The mind with reason is what distinguishes the two and allows one to see the variant beauty in each.

Being Healthy on Behalf of Others

One of the wonderful things about modern society is that we have very easy ability to be the healthiest creatures, regardless of how we were raised, and what's more is that we can use our very own health to help others. I think that is why I love donating blood so much. I simply take care of myself, and by taking care of myself not only do I sustain my own health for decades to come, but my healthy body can even sustain other bodies. Giving blood is also the most direct way to show yourself that yes, your life is literally useful to the life of another, so you better stay alive and well.

It fascinates me, how great of an ability the American person has to do good in the world. It brings moral responsibility to a whole other level.

Won't You light my way?

Lyrics to one of my favorite songs by Audioslave, Light My Way.

In my hour of need
On a sea of grey
On my knees I pray to You
Help me find the dawn
Of the dying day

[Chorus]
Won't You light my way?
Won't You light my way?
Won't You light my way?
Won't You light my way?

A bullet is a man
From time to time he strays
I compare my life to this
To this I remain
And I'm willing
To listen to Your answers
And I'm not ashamed
To tell You I need You today

[Chorus]

So when I'm lost
Or I'm tired and depraved
Or when my high bullet mind
Goes astray, won't You light my way?

Don't save it for another day
Don't save it for another day
Hey, don't save it for another day
Hey, don't save it for another day
Hey, don't save it for another day
Hey, don't save it for another day
Hey, don't save it for another day

[Chorus]

If it can go wrong, it will.

I have found that if what I am doing is not 100% in line with God's will, even if only seemingly slightly off, it is a hopeless endeavor. And this describes the "can" portion of Murphy's law, in my opinion. Anything done in obedience to and accordance with God cannot go wrong. If it can go wrong, it follows that it is not being done in obedience to and accordance with God, and therefore it will go wrong. Only God's will cannot go wrong, and will not go wrong. Anything else is fruitless.

100% honesty, or else it can go wrong, and it will.

If only to have gills.

I miss the water. I miss the silence and loneliness. I miss not being able to hear anyone no matter how loudly they yell. I miss being able to swim away. I miss controlling my breathing. I miss being able to sprint across the pool without taking a single breath.

The only things you hear in the water are your movements, and your thoughts. You only focus on your own existence. You only focus on getting to the wall, and back again. You try to make every stroke perfect. Every move you make has to be exactly calculated.

I miss having to isolate every single muscle at the perfect moment. I miss focusing on my skill and strength all by myself, without any criticism or input of others. I miss having every part of my body work seamlessly together.

I miss being alone.